When it comes to self-defense, bad advice can be more dangerous than no advice at all. Movies, social media, and even outdated training methods have helped spread some serious myths —beliefs that might make you feel safer but could actually put you in harm’s way. Even in today’s world, with our access to information like we have never seen before, we still see a lot of bad, bad self-defense advice. Let’s bust a few of the most common myths.
Myth #1: “Just kick them in the groin and run.”
Yes, the groin is a sensitive target—but it’s not a guaranteed fight-ender. People on adrenaline, drugs, or just plain rage might not react the way you expect. It’s a “weak point” that boys learn to protect instinctively and early in life. There are no special training programs or techniques required for a guy to learn to protect the “safety deposit box”, and indeed we usually do so without thought. Instead of relying on one “magic move,” you need to know how to follow up, create space, and get away safely.
Myth #2: “You’ll rise to the occasion.”
The truth? You will not rise to the occasion; you will fall to the level of training you’ve mastered. Without consistent, intense, and correct training in high-stress situations, your fine motor skills deteriorate, and your brain goes into survival mode. If you haven’t practiced responses repeatedly, you won’t be able to “think on your feet.” You will freeze, delaying your response times and compromising your ability to defend yourself.
Myth #3: “If I carry a weapon, I’m safe.”
Tools like pepper spray or a concealed weapon can be helpful—but only if you’ve trained with them (see #2 above!!). You also need to understand when and how to use them legally. Weapon retention is a major part of carrying any type of weapon. Otherwise, they might be used against you. And if you live in the wrong political environment, have the wrong post-incident training, or the wrong legal representation, you could end up facing jail time for legally defending yourself.
Myth #4: “It’s about fighting back.”
Self-defense is about avoiding danger first. Fighting is the last resort. Situational awareness, boundary setting, and the ability to leave early are more effective (and safer) than trying to “win” a physical altercation. And as I have written about before, there is a thin line between self-defense and assault. If you’re assaulted by an individual and you repel the attack and knock them down, then jump on top of them and continue your “defense”, you are likely to end up charged with assault yourself, getting a criminal record, or even a few day visit to the proverbial Gray Bar Hotel. If you’re not familiar with that establishment, it only gets 1-star reviews by those that stay there. You get a warm bed, three meals a day, and all of the company can stand, but the room service sucks. Defending yourself is your absolute right, but you have to have the right training, knowledge and mind set to know when enough is enough and that it’s time to stop and call the proper authorities.
Self-defense isn’t about flashy moves — it’s about smart decisions, realistic training, and keeping yourself out of trouble. Don’t fall for the myths. Train smart, stay sharp, and protect yourself with knowledge that works. Vet those whom you wish to train with well. With our access to information today, that has never been easier to do! Ensure that your proposed instructor has real training themselves, has actual experience in what they claim they are teaching, and can actually teach that information in such a way that you can understand it! And most importantly, keep training! As my old friend Neal used to say, “A little bit every day is better than a lot once in a while!”
